Skills assessments 2

During the skill assessment session the lady helped me go over my resume to see what jobs I really enjoyed, what I liked about them, my priorities today and what kind of job would match all those criteria.

My priorities are: getting a family friendly schedule and having a salary worth the commute. Hours and money. This screams work in an office..
So I register in a couple agencies to be hostess, receptionist, secretary and such...

While sending my application to different places I realized there was no amount of money that would motivate me to work full time in a boring agency answering phone calls and waiting for the day to be over so I can pick up a lonely baby and put him to bed only to send him back to day care at the crack of dawn...


So I looked more into retirement homes and decided that would be a good compromise: I can do something I care about, get flexible hours, a reasonable paycheck...
I thought about teaching too, but it's minimum wage, and I know how much work is involved, and sorry but this is not the time in my life when I am going to invest this much energy outside of my home and barely break even at the end of the month.

Anyway. So I went back to the counselor with many questions about what kind of jobs I can find in a retirement home and how to get somewhat involved in decision making processes and organisation. And she found the PERFECT program for me. It's a formation to become manager, only just for a section. Not the big boss business formation, the coordinator. :) And I love this idea.
Bonus: it's not only for retirment homes. It's for any social institution: reinsertion, handicapped children/adults, homeless centers... any social centers.
It has a cute name: CAFERUIS. like a good comforting drink...


Now I am researching this formation because it's pretty unknown of the wide public. I hope I can find something that let me have some family time.. Or some books that I could start reading before the baby is born...

Now I am more at peace with the idea of working.

Skills assessments

I have been going weekly to see a career counsellor with the unemployment agency of France. It's been going really well :)
It's a little bit like reading my great book : what color is your parachute?
but much more... superficial! So it goes much faster..
Also some weeks I haven't done much of what I was supposed to do, but that helps me see what I really care about (what I did) and what is not a priority in my life just yet..(and I didn't do!).
The skills assessment is great because I HAD TO face a major conflict of interest that I was avoiding for too long:
-stay at home or - work.

If it was only financial it would not be so hard I guess.. But it's more than this.
It's also about models and images. It took me a long time, but now I understand what someone was once saying about being a supermom and doing what is expected. I was wondering where those images come from, I don't know such a woman... And little by little I came to realize I see those models everywhere too now. If I read a blog about this lady who homeschools her kids, and documents it with application, I only remember this. Then the next documentary is about canning, and I see only this aspect, perfectly well mastered, of an other lady's life.. Little by little I get a mozaic picture of only perfect aspects of other people's lives and I feel like I'm expected to match up.. Self pressure? Media pressure? I don't know...
So currently by my acquaintances, readings and watching of various videos (thanks God I don't have tv) I have two pictures perfect opposing each other:

the stay-at-home american mom

and the do-it-all French perfect mom. And yes she works full time.
And smokes during breaks. And wears a size 4.


Obviously it's WAY easier for me to identify with the stay at home mom!!

-First of all I want to spend time home and take care of my child(-ren)!
I have no desire to leave at 7am and pick a poor tired kid at 7or 8 pm after a long boring day at work..
-Second I actually like the household stuff. I love cooking. I like doing menus to balance our meals and budget.. I even like cleaning!!
(As a kid one of my favorite game was to steal my mom's lipstick and write on a mirror, then I would take the windex and pretend I'm a commercial add: "see this dirty mirror? In no time, windex cleans it all!" ) Anyways...
-Lastly I can't get bored. I would love to developp skills like sewing and gardening, which require time and practice... And I easily get involved in local groups, like church and such so I would have a minimum of social life..


But there is indeed more social pressure to work in France. Well at least I feel it more here. Maybe it's the family. Working is the way to go.
Staying at home is an option, but not a career.
There is a law especially to give years off for young mothers with the guarantee of a job afterward. You take a parental leave. 1 year for the first kid, and then up to 3 years for the following ones.. So as long as you have a kid under 3 years old you can stay home. That is neat. :) BUT staying home and not even thinking of work or going back to it is not an option. Well maybe it is but it would just be weird in french people minds.

An other reason to motivate me towards work is recognition. (Pride?) To be acknowledged as able to do a job, if possible somewhat esteemed, feeling some accomplishment outside of the house.. But honestly if at the end of my life I can say I raised this one kid to be a happy, loving human being, that would be my best accomplishment...

Yet I am leaning towards working in a near future.
More on this later.

I have an interview!

Today!!! This afternoon in Paris I meet with a lady to talk about a job experiment of about 3-4 months as Public Relations!! :)
I am excited! I may not get the job, but at least she deemed my resume good enough to give it a try!
I also have an appointement tomorrow afternoon with a career counsellor to assess my skills.
It is just beyond my expectations, because I have 0 stress:
-we have enough money to live by so there is no stress of NEEDING this job.
-I am pregnant so if I don't get it I can focus on the baby.
-I am pregnant so I don't hope for a full time job afterwards.

I'm just plain happy, and motivated about finding what to do with a professional life.

New Year's post

Happy New Year everyone :)
I just had the best New Year's eve ever. Well I don't actually have a good memory for a new year eve.. nothing dramatic but nothing standing out either. I always was too young, too bored (TV!), too stressed or sleeping long before midnight...
But yesterday was different :)
I had a perfect evening with Mr L. We made little toasts of foie gras and pate, I had a can of peas and an apple (which makes for a perfect TV picnic diner ) and we watched Doctor Who. The full 1st season of the new series.
I was up till 1am our time!! :) And we had fun. We had plenty of bubbly soft drinks like mexican coke, izze fancy drinks and some sparkling tea. It was a very sweet evening. :)

We also talked about our best of 2009 and our best hopes for 2010.
So much to talk about!

2009:

-At some point we went to a retreat with Mr L's young adults group from church and we had a very good time of fellowship there. Following this he started the "Brodays" which are days of celebrating brotherhood of the BBQ. It was a lot of fun during the summer.
-We got married again! In April, we had a two week trip to France visiting family and getting married all over again :)
-We moved from New York to Chicago, and took a road trip through Canada.
-We (I) discovered Chicago. I love being here, the walks, the week ends, the life style..
-We got pregnant!! And decided to move back to France
So these are the main big events I can think of.

For 2010 I am looking forward to:

-visit of my father in law: tonight! or tomorrow morning..
-moving!! just 12 TWELVE days to go!!
-my mom's birthday (in february)
-visiting friends
-visiting my grand father
-my sister's baby in March
-my cousin Sylvaine's baby in May
-OUR baby in July!!!
-my cousin Irene's baby in September
-Next Christmas with everyone
-Week ends in Europe: Scotland, Britany (region of France) Sweden, Bayern..
as much as we can do before baby's here... and maybe after ;)

My plans and objectives for 2010:
-finding a house/apartment to rent.
-passing the driver license!! Getting over the fear of traffic..
-no judgemental critics of random people
- for right now finding a temp job with free week ends
-for end 2010 finding a real good job, with week ends and hopefully 4/5 (which means I get 4/5 of the salary, usually same amount of work, but going to work only 4 days a week) or part time??? Or teaching in catholic schools. I like this option quite :)

That's pretty ambitious already..

Work...

When I get back to France I will hopefully be able to work for a few months as temp. The good think about temp job is that I won't feel bad to start a job at 6months pregnant :) The second positive aspect is that I can stay off for maternity as long as we can afford it without the pressure of a stable position to get back too.
But after some time I will have to face it: I don't know what to do with my professional life!!! I would really like to work in a retirement home, but I promised Mr L I would not work evenings and week ends again. And I think I made this promise to myself too.
Ideally I would love to stay at home, but I don't know how possible this will be on the long run. So I was thinking of teaching. I was a school teacher for a very short time. I did not like the formation I received. I think it was not preparing me for anything. Really. And I was lost with some classes, if the kids didn't take on my nice introduction I would get really nervous and keep talking on and on, just telling them instead of making them do the work.. Not an easy work. But I did like it..
I think starting as a substitute teacher would probably be the best for me, I could see a few different classes, grades, teachers' methods, without all the pressure from the parents, because well a sub is temporary.
I don't know if I'm approaching professional life with the right angle though. I want to find a job that would fit me, that I would like to do and that will give me plenty of family time.. I don't know if such a thing exists!
I guess I have time to think about it :)

Lessons form work

Back in August the director of my previous job asked me to write an article about what I learned in Abraham House. In French.
I haven't done it yet.. :( ooops!
I have two main problems (or excuses for laziness):
- believe it or not, but English (as lousy as my English is) comes to me easier than French for work related experience. Probably because it all happened in English.
-and my second big obstacle is that most things I learned where from bad experiences. I have good memories, but the most important things I learned where not fun, and are not things that are politically correct.
Example: I learned that some people are poor because they waste money as soon as they get it. Some people are just plain lazy. Some people are blaming the world on others and stay stuck in their problems, waiting for them to go away by magic.
I learned that not all kids are equal. And the difference is not the parents' income but the parents' attention and desire to raise them well.
I learned that communication is an essential component in an organization.
I learned that it is important to take time to thank your employees and praise them when you are a manager.
I learned that money matters. Volunteering is an admirable thing, but you need to remember to feed yourself first, and to have money set aside for health care.

Ok this is not really negative stuff, but I have to find a way to talk about it with a positive tone. I also want to talk about all the good stuff. How it doesn't take much to see the best emerge in anyone: take a day off to Mariendale (the park we had family days in) and it's a whole different story.
Abraham House was a human experience for me. It was the tightest time of my life (so far) and that does create tensions. This is something I shared with people there. Would I become anxious, stressed out and take it on my kids? I don't know, but I don't want to judge because it's a hard time when you can't have both ends meet.

I don't know if I can write about this. I can surely write about Mariendale though :)
I can write about Saturdays, and how a few words with some people can keep you going for the week. How you can find hope, encouragement and love in many unexpected situations..

boring post for Saturday

Today is my last Saturday at work. I feel sorry to admit that I won't miss it. I don't know when and how, but it slowly went from a job I loved to a chore I have to get through. I count hours until I can be done with it.
I enjoy many aspects of my work. But I have been more and more aware of the parts I dislike, and I probably got less involved and attentive, hence less contact with people, hence I like it even less.
For example I just got in. There is a group of teens on the side table, they don't answer my "hi!" or is it in my head? I see some people sitting at tables, we exchange a couple smiles. Then I went straight to my office, to print the bulletin of the week. Last week I didn't think about it until the last minute, the lady who usually takes care of it wasn't there and nobody took over.. I know it's silly but I feel like very few people are putting efforts in making this place a community, and I don't want to be the last one trying, I think I gave up. :( This is when it's time to quit I guess.

Well this sounds very negative, we do have a community here. But it's too hard for me to be STAFF AND Community. There are many things I am not allowed to do as staff, like going to visit people or inviting them over, that makes it hard to feel part of it. I'm glad we're moving because I don't feel in a church, I'm at work, but in a routine not enthusiastic way. The thing I really look forward to every week is the sharing group. This reflexion is my food for the journey. :)

You know it's time to change job when the highlight of your week is to go to jail!
;)

Setting changes

Yesterday I changed the settings of this blog to "private". I don't think it's really necessary actually. I would love to have a less radical way to restrict access, like only people whose blogs I visit could see mine or some screening like publishing some posts to full public, and some with restricted access.

My number one concern is work.
I work in Abraham house. I'm so happy I can actually mention it now, without the fear that google searches will end here! :)
I need a place to vent my frustrations about work, but also share the good stuff, and there is plenty. I felt very limited in the past because I can't mention names or post pictures of people on an open access blog.
here are some beautiful pictures taken by Rachel Cobb. I recently discovered how much I like photography. I think Rachel Cobb is extremely gifted. These pictures have been taken in Abraham House. This tells you better than words about what happens here. We do have a description that tries to put words on it:
"Abraham House offers the incarcerated and their relatives a place of hope and community, where lives can be rebuilt, families mended, lessons learned, and men, women and children deeply marked by crime receive the spiritual, social and practical tools to become productive citizens."



My second reason is that this is more or less a diary to me and I talk about some personal stuff. My husband has access to this, but not my family or friends (they just never asked...) and that gives me some freedom to know that they won't come across it by chance.

My third reason is the pictures. I don't want to take the risk to see my pictures used without my knowing.

If there was any way to put SOME restrictions, without going paranoiac, I would chose that :)
So far the closest would be to click the " adult only" box.
But that would be sending the wrong message! LOL

I changed my profile so people can contact me by email to be added on the reading list. Unfortunately there is no automatic way to add readers, I need to send an email, so if I don't have your email... well you can't read that!

Anyway, all comments welcome. I may change my mind and register as adult only ;) TBC...

When it rains, it pours...

Well not really. I just like this saying. :)
It has been very stormy around here... I'm a little worried about the garden...

Summary of my adventures these past few days:
- I lost my Dept of Correction ID. :( I felt so bad. It's not that hard to redo but I was very upset to misplace it. I'm VERY careful with papers, that the one thing I don't want to lose. I looked everywhere in my purse, in my office, in my bedroom, in the laundry basket...
And I found it in a book. As a bookmark. Good job Tiphaine! In the library book I was going to return.. I'm glad I found it before I returned it!

-I was working this week end. I took the guys to Ikea again. They just LOVE it. What a success! I must say it's very selfish of me because we have 45 min subway to go to bowling green, and as much on the way back, and that means I can read :) Then the boat is free, and so much fun. Everyone likes it. :) This time we got a funky captain, he put the music loud in the boat, and slowed down when passing by the statue of liberty. Then in Ikea we had some hot dogs, ice creams and cinnamon buns. I kept it to a coffee, because I still have those 15 lbs to lose....
Anyway Ikea is the place to go. :)

- Mr. L. told me my English is not great (he was not being mean, just pointing out some things) so please, please, let me know when I don't make sense... Or what I can improve, especially if it's a recurring problem.

- Still devising what I should do in Chicago: work in some catholic organization? work in ATI? go back to school and get a PhD in linguistics? in Latin? I would love the linguistics studies, but I don't want to go back to school just for the love of studies, I can do that on my own... If I get back to school it has to be to get a job related with the field.
right now I lean towards ATI work. But my number one requirement is " office hours" liek 8-5 Monday-Friday. And I don't know if I can find this...
Oh well I have a few more months to think about it. Anyway I would need a green card, so I won't be able to do anything before 2010.
Yeah for 4 months long holidays! :)

boring for Saturday

let me try this one... " Boring post for saturday".
well it's saturday night, I'm still at work. Only a few minutes before I can go. I figure it's ok to take a break and write a post because I've been here 12 hours straight, with a 15 minutes break for food..
Anyway Saturday is the busiest day here. we have 100 families or more for fellowship, mass and diner. With CCD and workshops on top of that, food drive, clothes drive and social services.
And no lunch break :(

I do the CCD for the first communion group, and gardening with some kids.
The gardening was great. I had only 4 kids today!! We saw the difference between parsley and cilantro, tomatoes and beans, radice and broccoli... all of which are growing well.

With the first communion kids I wanted to do Zachee, the little guy in the tree. Because next week is the big day, and I wanted them to know why we say " I'm not worthy to receive you" before communion.. Well I was called to more earthly needs, we had to "repeat" for next week. Who sits where, how to stand up without sounding like a bunch of elephants, no gums, put your hands together, no nose picking etc...
Then it was funny to teach them how to put their hands together to receive communion, to say amen, to look at the eucharist.

the funniest part was when I said " oh and don't forget your second communion in two weeks!"
And they all stared at me like" what??!! no one told us about this!!" poor little kids, they were so funny. Then I said " Yes, and then there is the third one, and forth, and a hundredth and communion two thousand three... they are all very important days. We just didn't prepare only your first communion, we prepared for all the ones after that..." then they understood and they smiled. How cute they are!!:)

Actually my day was not boring at all :) I really like those kids, we just spent one year together and I would like to give them a nice present.
I'll think about it.

have a good night all.

if it's not my way, it's not good enough...

yes, that's more or less what I was thinking during Pentecost mass today... :(
We just had a retreat at work, for families and people of the community, and everyone was happy about it. But I was already dismissing the benefits of the day judging on people's faces. During the "sharing time" many people looked bored.
It was quite long indeed...

Anyway, I shouldn't decide that people are bored because they don't look radiant and transformed.
I was started a little monologue starting with " if I could really prepare a retreat here I would do this and that and prepare this way and ask him and her and blablabla..." then the monologue turns into some crazy " and people would really understand this verse and it would make sense for them, and it would change their lives like it changed mine..."
and later on the monologue went " but THEY wanted to do as usual, if THEY don't want to change anything of course it's not going to make a difference.."

blabla ranting..

At some point I realize those were not very positive thoughts and that there was probably something wrong with ME...
And I remembered I hadn't eat since 9 AM... Yes, I'm this bad when I need food...

Anyway I also remembered that it's not all about me, and it doesn't really matter the way we present things during a retreat, and if some parts are boring, oh well, most of it was fine, and some people shared very deep reflections, and were very touched by the verses we selected, we as a team :)

We celebrate Pentecost this week end: the coming of the Spirit, the beginning of Church. Sometimes I wish everyone would just realize how amazing it is to just believe in God. Then to just imagine for a minute that God cared so much that he BECAME human. I would love to share that... But it's not up to me to decide that they will understand or even listen.
There was a fun post in conversion diary the other day about the tow-truck driver. It's not all about me sharing what I believe, well this time it's maybe about me learning, and getting new perspectives in my faith. Or maybe it's just about respecting God's timing, which is not always the one we want.

I have a very big love for my parishes (wherever I am) and I pray for the example of St Jean Vianney, who transmitted God's message so well that his whole parish was transformed.
I have ambition for my parish you see, and I have high expectations from pastors...
So I guess my hungry grumpiness and my ambitions teamed up to discourage me.
ah! the never ending work of fighting self-pity...
When I should be really happy indeed, because it was a nice day of sharing and learning. I had the children and we prepared a nice poster about the pentecost and the gifts of the Spirit. I could use some of those gifts! (wisdom, courage, piety...)


The Holy Spirit is called "Father of the poor" because it can let the spirit of poverty be born into your heart. That's what I ask for today, a spirit of humulity and poverty.
Humility that frees you..

roses in our lives

Trying to get into the habit of posting short but frequently...
I wish I would take time to journal instead of using the internet, but I realized I like getting comments, and linking things together with URL :)

Anyway. On wednesdays I go to Rikers for a praying group with a few inmates.
Rikers is an island, with only prison-buildings, each circled with many wires and walls and security posts. There is also a bunch of prefab for offices. Those have been around for decades (the priest I work with was there about 30 years ago and it didn't change since).
We went to ask a car-pass to get easier access with our own car, and in front of the office were the most beautiful rose-bushes I have ever seen. Very big, fully bloomed, with many more young roses coming up. So much beauty!

During the Bible group one inmate brought up his concerns: when he is in jail he is a very religious person, he takes time to pray, he has a straight life and everything is fine.. But then he comes out and forgets about it. And gets re-arrested.
It's easier to be faithful when you are apart from all temptations.
We talked about how there is a difference between a religion that is "around" you, and a religion that is "inside" of you.
If you become religious because, let's face it, there is nothing else better to do, then it will fade away as soon as you have something else in mind. (And all people say: "women!")
We talked about the reasons why we are religious. It's ok to start attending religous classes in jail (or anywhere) because you want company and something to do. It's plain human. But at some point the search for God has to become personal. At some point you need to radically change your life.
Radically, from latin radix= the root. You have to change your life from its very inside.
Not change as in becoming someone different, change as in getting a different orientation in who you are.

An old man I know was always saying: "Be a good friend, be like rain and sunshine on your friends. Rain and sunshine won't turn a cactus into a strawberry, but they will the cactus to grow to what it is meant to be."
I like this.

My favorite example is St Francis of Assisi. He wanted to be a knight. He even went on his way to a crusade. But after he turned his life to God he oriented this desire differently. He didn't lose this combative, almost provocative character, but it turned it to love. He decided to embrace the way of Lady Poverty... He took on ambitious projects, he was still very absolute in his way of life. Still himself, but oriented not for his own impulses, oriented towards the Holy Spirit.


My ministry is not to turn those guys into church ladies. Our ministry is to provide them with knowledge of their faith, to provoke questions and reflexions, and to pray together.
I hope that they will find an orientation and a meaning to their lives. A meaning that direct them towards what really matters: a stronger family, an optimist spirit, a servant heart.

catching up

I haven't post in long... No particular reasons, just a regular life, with lots to do!
I just had 2 whole days off :) Happy memorial day everyone!!

I love grilling! Mr L. does grilled asparagus, which are divine. He is awesome at grilling anything (meat, veggies, even polenta!)

My cycle should be over now, so I took a pregnancy test this morning: negative :(
Oh well it's just our first real trying...
Also in the last ccl magazine there was an article about "cycle variants".
here are some parts of the article that I found interesting:
" It is very tempting for young women to presume they will experience "text-book" fertility cycles. It only stands to reason : they are young and in the prime of their fertility [...] The ideal NFP chart, however is often not experienced.[...] Dr Brown's finding have led him to conclude that many cycle irregularities experienced by young women should be considered normal. [...]" Cycle variants should not be considered as abnormal; they are normal response to the environment to ensure that pregnancy does not occur under very unfavorable conditions for the mother and fetus." ...[...] cycle varients occuring in a young woman's cycle are nature wake-up calls; something is out of order within the woman's life: too much stress, too little nutritious food, too much or too little excersice, too little sleep etc."

I thought it was really interesting to read that on my second 38+ days cycle in a row...
I finally accepted that hubby is right and I put too much pressure on myself at work. The management is very unclear and there are many contradictory demands every week or more often. This and my crazy hours ( 30 hours over 6 days, mainly on saturdays and evenings..) make sense: I'm indeed under some stress.

This week I also learned something important. I learned that saying " I'm sorry" is actually useful. For some weird reason I always saw the "forgive me " thing as something to do to make yourself feel better: I recognise I hurt you, I feel bad to have you feel this way, I won't do it again...
Until last week when my co-worker apologized to me, and I felt better. :) It was a really new experience for me (I'm 25!!!).
I was resentful because of some small things that happened recently (mainly a lack of communication on schedules and a lack of recognition) and I mentioned the dysfunctions to her, and she minimized it, which made me feel even more resentful.. Then it was my day off, and got over it at some point. But when I came to work the following morning, my coworker came to me and said " Oh I'm glad you're here, I wanted to tell you I'm sorry for what happened the other day, I wasn't aware you didn't know you would be alone..." or something like that. I felt like 200 lbs flying off me :)

Apologies feel good sometimes. :) I'm glad I now understand how it works both ways..

great outing under 5$ in NYC!

This week end I worked more than 20 hours. In just a week end...
The funny part is that Friday my employer told me to limit my time to 30 hours a week, not more, and that she knows we agreed on me having a Saturday off every month, but they can't do it anymore (I was on a retreat last week and apparently that was too much people that particular week). Hmm sure... Dear hubby was not very happy about it. Me neither. I don't feel much consideration.

On Sundays my job is to take our residents out, so they can enjoy a nice activity that makes them feel good. Without spending money. Well that's not true, we got metrocards :)
And there was only one guy with me (the others had home visits and the new one wasn't here yet). Off we go to central park. On the way to the subway he tells me: "oh let's go to the Staten Island ferry!"
That sounded like a good idea, until I remembered my last trip to ikea Brooklyn :)
There is a free water taxi! It's so much more fun than the Staten Island ferry! It's smaller, so more sensations, and you can sit outside and it goes so fast!
On top of that in Staten Island there is not much to do in just 1/2h. But in Ikea they have hotdogs for 50 cts, ice creams for a dollar etc.

In the mean time Mr L. had friends over for BroDay, so when I got home at 10pm they were still a couple people watching Die Hard. They saved me steak :) and there was still TP in the bathroom. Good guys!

work update

Yesterday we had a "neighborhood breakfast".
We invited other associations working in social services in the neighborhood.
It was SO interesting!
They were many places doing the same work as us, with much more staff and opportunities, so I guess we can start referring some people to them, and lighten up the load on our multitasking staff members! :) Yay for cooperation!
This way we free time for focusing on our specificities: families of the incarcerated.
Well this was just a breakfast, where people presented their work, but it's a great first step towards a good synergy of efforts to help those who need the most.
- one organization was providing ESL classes, parenting groups, and many useful or fun workshops (salsa, yoga, housing etc..)
-a health care center provide social services to help people identify which services and help they qualify for, whether they are documented or not
-this other agency we've been working with for so long provides drug, alcohol and substance abuse counseling, and anger management workshops
-then there was the local charter school, 392 kids!!
- and a couple other organizations comparable to #1,2,3..
The breakfast went very well, we hope to keep in touch with a follow up in September :)


Also this morning we went to Rikers, in the C 73, for a Bible class.
I went to jail many times before, as a student-teacher and as a visitor. I went mostly to Fleury Merogis, which is the biggest prison in France, and in Europe (at least back then, who knows now...) and it was only 6 buildings, 3 parts each 5 for men and 1 for women.
Rikers is different. It's its whole little universe, with a bus system and 10 HUGE buildings. Only 9 are in service right now, but still.
I was impressed by the efficiency of the officers.
Sister S., 83 years old, 22 years as a chaplain in the very same building (but that was about 12 years ago) was not very happy with all the wait and troubles we had: check ID, check clearance order, refuse us the gate 1 pass, which meant we had to park on the big parking and then take a bus, which means a lot of wait... Then inside the building we had to wait for an officer to escort us, because we were not allowed alone, etc. But in the end in about 30 min we were settled in our room, and within 10 minutes we had 20 guys for the Bible study!!

THIS was incredible to me. In France, well in Fleury- Merogis, it took MONTHS to just get the clearance and settle something like an escort and a room, and then an other 2 weeks before we got anyone for the class...

So this morning was a very positive experience in my eyes. We spent maybe an hour and a half total in "doors" (the wait time in front of a door, or gate, before they check you and open it) and procedures, and about the same with the guys of our bible study. They were so happy to get a new bible class. The chaplain is overwhelmed by the demand, there is a lot of catholic people in this building (i don't know if it's a very good thing to rejoice about LOL). Anyway they told us to expect 100 people next wednesday!! Good thing there is 5 of us!

island trips coming up...

... it's an island in the middle of the big city.

An island conveniently hidden on the subway maps by a neat little frame with informations.

An island from which you can see La Guardia Airport on one side, and Randalls Island, full of children playing on the other side.

An island with about 13 000 people living, and 10 000 working...

We start a discussion group over there this Wednesday, our house is going back to its roots :)

Rikers Island, where everything started.
I hope that one day the penal system will take care of its offenders, giving them an opportunity to get their lives back together instead of sending them to a little cage on an island for a few years, hoping they'll get out at peace with the society who cut them from whatever they had left of a normal life....

art project: final! :)

We finished the big work on the art room last Saturday.
AND, it will not be undone as soon as expected!! YAY!!
here are some pictures of the colorful room :)
kids working, it was busy, a little hard to keep them all busy... I appointed 3 of them " Masters of the Sponge", their mission was to clean the mess of the others... They were almost fighting to become " Master of the Sponge"! But if I ask them to pick up a paper : "why me?" I need to find a cool name for paper pick up... sigh.


side of the room with the sunrise.. The ceiling is also covered with blue paper, part of it painted in black, part with a few clouds... I didn't take picture of the whole thing though..
and this is the sunset part of the sky, with our sparkling purple mountains...
The tree, made of cardboard pieces, covered with glue and shredded construction paper. The leaves are in the shape of Palms. They all wrote a prayer on one side of the leaves, and we put them up for Palm Sunday. During the upcoming weeks we'll write more prayers to put up..
the artists! (some heads cut, sorry...)

the busyness in the cafeteria on Saturdays afternoons:

Smug...

So I was at work, and one of our residents, who is fan of a certain tv show, asked me if I knew anyway to save it on dvd for him... So I went ahead and downloaded the serie for him. But then we met a problem: no Divx player on the computers of their living room! Bummer!
So I tried to install one. But bummer again, I don't know the administrative password. Of course, no one knows it. The computers have been installed for a few years, and the guy who put them up left several years ago, with the precious password...
But a little password isn't going to stop me I said. Armed with a copy of Ubuntu I decided to convert our guys to Linux, at least to initate them (looks great on a resume if you know a little bit about computers...)
Smuged! The computers can't even detect the CD, yet alone reboot form it!

Anyway... I haven't said my last word. I'll try again.

I'm so happy I switched to Ubuntu about a year ago.
Not that I use my computer beyond very basics functions, but I just like the idea of not paying microsoft..
I also really enjoy the flexibility and openess of the system. It actually made me want to learn about computers, and what applications can be useful for me, how to install them etc.

Looking for a direction...

Art project with the kids: our room looks good, here are some pictures :)

things have evolved a little bit and I'm quite happy with the results :)

We have purple mountains, a tree, a sky with starry night, sunset and clouds etc.
and these are the plants, drying, so we can put them in place tomorrow.
Wednesday I went in the room to pick up some construction paper, and I saw someone wrote on the walls.. :( I was so sad and disappointed... Some teenager wrote "Welcome in the Art room!!" and drew some flags. Nothing very offensive, but it was on the light yellow paint of the walls so it really shows..

Then Thursday we had a staff lunch so that we get a chance to meet each other and talk and chat randomly. It was bright and sunny. I sat down and talked a little bit. At some point an other staff member started talking about her boyfriends and how she never ever wants to get married. "And by the way why people even get married?" I was very surprised to hear that on the workplace. I mean two weeks ago we had a meeting with all parents of the afterschool program to insist on the importance of family time, and of community... We work every day to make up for the consequences of broken families. If anywhere some people should value strong family connexions that should be HERE. Why say that? And worse, the new director agreed, he mentioned the french civil pact, that lasts 5 years, saying it's a great alternative. Really? Are you promoting disposable family? What happen after 5 years? You just break free? Oh I was so surprised!
The worst part in my opinion is that if they really believe so they are hypocrits. On one hand they say to the parents: "work on your families" and to the fundations" we defend strong family values" and on the other hand they could care less because " every one is different and have different opinion..." Well I'm sorry but we just had a meeting about how freaking important it is for a child to have both parents working together to rise him/her in order to succeed and have a healthy life.
Anyway just venting my incomprehension.
Later that afternoon I went to the art room again, to clean up the flags and welcome... And here I find a new teacher. He is Art Teacher.
"Great! welcome enjoy your work here, sorry for the mess we're in the middle of a project, but I'll organize better the stuff...
- Oh no worries, see we are going to redecorate this entire room! :)"
BIG huge smile on his face.
I felt like the ground was opening under my feet.
I hesitated between fainting and bursting in tears.

I let him know that we're not even done with our project, that the room was white for months.. That at least he should wait until we're done with the younger children...
He said " oh well, let me know, because the teens are really excited about this project!"
There it hurt me even more. This guy is a new teacher, obviously he started without anyone telling him that we had a project going on. But the children who come here EVERYDAY, including week ends, THEY should know their own little borthers and sisters are doing something. THEY should have noticed that the room was being a little more colorful every week.
How could they not say : " nice project teacher, but I think some kids are already doing this..."

It's like swiming across the ocean of indifference... I hope I'm halfway throught it...

Art Project part II :)

Saturday always flies! I get in at noon, and before I know it it's evening!
Pepito the fish, who survived in a plexiglass dish for months died suddenly when we got him a nice aquarium with more space...
So Joy got 20!! new goldfish. The hope is that one of them survives until next Saturday.


Here are my kids painting clouds for the ceiling...

This is the plan to make plants and herbs for the future river: paint paper, than cut pieces of the paper and paste them together as grass...



But after 1/2h it became obvious we wouldn't have time to do all in one day!!

I love those children so much!! They are really cute and happy. :)



Here they are, coming down the stairs with their green hands up :) They thought it was so much fun! :)
Here is the older group's take on the Temple in Jerusalem. I think it looks much better than I expected!


Week 2 and going strong! Next week we'll take care of the walls :)