"This is my beloved Child.."

..is what God said to Jesus at his baptism, and what he says to each one of us at our own.

Our baby Corbinien has been baptized Saturday night during mass. It was very beautiful and touching.
He was fussy for the first half of the service but he then fell asleep and it made it much easier for the actual baptism!





What does baptism changes?
Honestly I believe my baby is a child of God whether baptized or not.
I believe he can be a good person without it and he can be part of the universal church without it.
That's just my opinion.

Here is what happens during a baptism and makes the difference:
- rejecting Evil.
The very first step during the celebration is to reject Evil. As the baby is too young the priest asks us parents and godparents if we are willing to reject the evil in our lives. For me this is a good reminder of that daily struggle we all have. Publicly aknowledging that this struggle exists is already great, on top of that we all commit ourselves to fight our own struggles.
- receiving the water.
A sacrament for the catholics is a sign of God's presence and action in our lives. The sacrament of baptism cleans us from the original sin (which is to doubt of God's good will and love for us). The grace of the sacrament is a strength that helps us in our daily struggles.
As parents and god parents we commit ourselves to help the child remember his baptism, that is to remember that God is love, and only love.

All sins have roots in the belief that God doesn't care or doesn't want the best for his children.

I don't care if my kids don't send thank you notes after their birthday, if they know that God is loving and they are happy to be alive I'll consider it a successful education ;)

-receiving the unction
the baby is anointed with holy oil, he receives his call as "priest, prophet and king" .
The priest honors God, the prophet lives according to his beliefs not according to what people will say and the king is responsible. That is just a basic line to understand this call.
-receiving the light
"you are the salt of the earth", to be sent in the world as a witness of God's love for humankind.


To sum it up (maybe more clearly) I think the baptism makes a difference because it engages the new christian in the community and in the world around him.
Baptizing a newborn then makes sense as his parents and godparents engage themselves to raise him in this prospective.

Sunday in the gardens

Sunday we went to a presbyterian church in Paris, it is the only of its kind in France!

We may go back there. It would be nice to have some routine for the week ends, we can have the local church (for me) on Saturday nights and the Scottish church in Paris on Sunday mornings (for Mr L.)

After service we had a very nice walk in Paris and went to the Jardins du Luxembourg. It was beautiful.

And we had ice cream. :)

One of the statues of all queens of France, all around the garden.

the Senate.

receive the gift of Faith

We are celebrating the Holy Spirit for Pentecost. There are very few celebrations for the Holy Spirit unfortunately..
We also celebrate the begining of the Church, as the disciples started spreading the word after they received the Spirit.
There are two versions of the event one is in John chapter 20 and the other is in Act, chapter 2.
But there is also this mention of the Spirit in Luke 4:

He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. And he stood up to read. The scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written:
"The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to preach good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to release the oppressed,
to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."

Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him, and he began by saying to them, "Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing."

I don't have much time to comment but I just wanted to share that in celebrating the holy Spirit we celebrate the incarnation of the Word. We ourselves are called to let the Spirit speak through us, we are called to receive the Spirit, and be part of the body of Christ (the Church).
Let's take it seriously and make sure we do our best with every little moment we have to show how much love God really is.

Christ is Risen Alleluia!

We went to mass yesterday, it lasted 2h30 according to my watch, about 15 min to me!
We begin with a fire outside, the priest read a short introduction of the 3 adults that were receiving baptism that night, he was very welcoming. People form different parishes came to light up the yearly candle. Then everyone goes in and lighten up candles, it's the only light in the church (well except for one for the readers and one for the singers).
Inside the celebration begins with the "Economy of Salavation" these are 7 readings and psalms telling the story between God and men from the creation on. Most churches reduce it to 4 readings. It was the case at my parish. I think 4 is plenty because not that many people listen that long anyway, but oh isn't it wonderful? To be reminded of the whole story.. One of the skipped reading is Isaiah 54: 5-14 where God is sadden by the unfaithfulness of his people, like an unfaithful wife, and how he will protect her and restate her in her beauty.
I was so proud because I was asked to do a reading! Ezekiel (36 especially 18 to 28) which completes perfectly the one mentioned above (even if it wasn't read aloud it's in the missals so some people probably read it...What? me naive?)
After the readings of the Old testament is the first high point of Easter:
the lights turn on as we sing the gloria.
Catholic services are said to be boring and desincarnated, but really catholicism is the most sensorial religion I know, well maybe orthodox churches win.. But really it's so moving and symbolic how we go from dark to light, from readings about salvation to REJOICING about it!! :)
After the gloria we have one more reading; St Paul about the baptism, and a psalm, and second high point of the evening: The bells ring! It was 10pm in my church when the bell rang, the priest took a break to listen to them. You could tell he was happy :) I like this priest. And right after the bells we sing the Alleluia, first since the begining of Lent..
Then comes the Gospel, sermon, prayers..
I mean obviously the Gospel is also a high point; but on Easter night I especially enjoy those moments that we have only once a year..
Then came the liturgy of the Baptism for the adults. It was very beautiful but it would be very long to describe step by step.
Then the Eucharist, always a high point ;)
and before I knew it it was over!

I also got to hold Mr L.'s hand all along.. :) Does it count as high point too? ;)

Easter Vigil is my favorite part of Easter. later today( it's early sunday morning for me) we are going to my parents' place to celebrate with a good meal and egg hunt for the kids.. I wish I could share my enthusiasm about the evening with everyone, especially my little god son :) We'll see..

Sweet week end :)

Saturday Mr L made excellent blueberry pancakes for breakfast. Then we went on a walk, and we walk from noon to about 9pm. Almost 10 miles! It was a lovely walk in a nice neighborhood, we saw so many houses decorated for Halloween!
We also stopped by a park to have fun on the swings (there was nobody, so we didn't steal them from the kids.. and after 10 min an other adult couple joined us!). We visited a pet shop, to see how much we need to budget for various expenses for the dog. The lady who owned the shop was very knowledgable, she adviced us a couple place to go, like a dog friendly beach etc..
We enjoyed the walk a lot! :) But we both need better shoes! Hiking boots? and snow boots, coming soon...
In the evening we watched "cracking the maya code", a documentary about how scientists and linguists understood, step by step, the mayan language. really good documentary. On netflix :)

Today we went to a new presbyterian church. It would be very easy to get by bus, but this bus is not running on sundays. So it's bus, train, train. But still only one hour. The people were very nice, and they have many good programs. I hope this becomes our new church. I'm still going to my parish tonight tough ;) I just can't change I guess :)

We went to a store with adorable christmas decorations, and I got some for my sister :
She loves snowmen, so she'll get the 6 little ones, the mouse and the bigger snowman. The owl on the top left is for my dad, the two little dragons are for someone on an internet forum (ornament exchange) and the raccoon is for our home. Last year we decided to buy only one new Christmas ornament per year. We have some donation stuff and family heritage. But for new stuff we thought it'd be better to get only one per year, and find a meaningful one.
Last year I got a felt heart in white, green and red. Mostly white. As a memory of our wedding :) The racoon is for my excitment with racoons. Racoons are VERY exotic to me. I'm so thrilled when we randomly see them at sunset!! I call my mom to tell her :) So, this little raccon symbolises our new neighborhood, by the river. And that we will spend much more time out during week ends. Hello hiking :)

Now off to church :)

Psalms- waiting list

I think most of readers here are religious and familiar with psalms.
I love psalms, they are like a second language, a language for prayer..

Sometimes I come across a song or an hymn that are really pertinent to me. And I think of them as an apocryph book of psalms. Like a waiting list for the next edition.
Do you know what I mean?

Today I think of East to West from Casting Crowns. It's my song for today. Hanging there hoping for a more faithful tomorrow.

Here I am Lord and I'm drowning
In a sea of forgetfulness
The chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I don't want to end up where you found me
And it echoes in my mind
Keeps me awake tonight

I know you've cast my sins as far
As the East is from the West
And I stand before you now
As though I've never sinned but today
I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way

Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other

I start the day the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
Time and time again
Your Truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way

Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other

I know you've washed me white
Turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through
To get me through this night
I can't live by what I feel
But by the truth your word reveals
I'm not holding on to you
But you are holding on to me

Picture is from John Adams, Mount Williamson

F#amily Day!

Last week we had a day out in upstate NY, on the shores of the Hudson river. It's so beautiful!
Here are some pictures of the picnic. It's so great to see families together, simply having a good time...
I must say I'm proud of my pictures, they really look good. :) We took each family together to give them a picture as a memory. I just post very few for the atmosphere.. :)
(I took them down actually, I'm such a whimp but you never know who may take your pics...)





and here is the hole where I saw 2 groundhog disappearing!!!

aw... :')

My little kids on their first communion day :)
I finally found pictures!!

I must admit I have a favorite, or two .. :) This little girl on the right is so sweet!!


and he could be my second favorite.. :)

aw some kids I won't forget that fast... :)

if it's not my way, it's not good enough...

yes, that's more or less what I was thinking during Pentecost mass today... :(
We just had a retreat at work, for families and people of the community, and everyone was happy about it. But I was already dismissing the benefits of the day judging on people's faces. During the "sharing time" many people looked bored.
It was quite long indeed...

Anyway, I shouldn't decide that people are bored because they don't look radiant and transformed.
I was started a little monologue starting with " if I could really prepare a retreat here I would do this and that and prepare this way and ask him and her and blablabla..." then the monologue turns into some crazy " and people would really understand this verse and it would make sense for them, and it would change their lives like it changed mine..."
and later on the monologue went " but THEY wanted to do as usual, if THEY don't want to change anything of course it's not going to make a difference.."

blabla ranting..

At some point I realize those were not very positive thoughts and that there was probably something wrong with ME...
And I remembered I hadn't eat since 9 AM... Yes, I'm this bad when I need food...

Anyway I also remembered that it's not all about me, and it doesn't really matter the way we present things during a retreat, and if some parts are boring, oh well, most of it was fine, and some people shared very deep reflections, and were very touched by the verses we selected, we as a team :)

We celebrate Pentecost this week end: the coming of the Spirit, the beginning of Church. Sometimes I wish everyone would just realize how amazing it is to just believe in God. Then to just imagine for a minute that God cared so much that he BECAME human. I would love to share that... But it's not up to me to decide that they will understand or even listen.
There was a fun post in conversion diary the other day about the tow-truck driver. It's not all about me sharing what I believe, well this time it's maybe about me learning, and getting new perspectives in my faith. Or maybe it's just about respecting God's timing, which is not always the one we want.

I have a very big love for my parishes (wherever I am) and I pray for the example of St Jean Vianney, who transmitted God's message so well that his whole parish was transformed.
I have ambition for my parish you see, and I have high expectations from pastors...
So I guess my hungry grumpiness and my ambitions teamed up to discourage me.
ah! the never ending work of fighting self-pity...
When I should be really happy indeed, because it was a nice day of sharing and learning. I had the children and we prepared a nice poster about the pentecost and the gifts of the Spirit. I could use some of those gifts! (wisdom, courage, piety...)


The Holy Spirit is called "Father of the poor" because it can let the spirit of poverty be born into your heart. That's what I ask for today, a spirit of humulity and poverty.
Humility that frees you..

catching up

I haven't post in long... No particular reasons, just a regular life, with lots to do!
I just had 2 whole days off :) Happy memorial day everyone!!

I love grilling! Mr L. does grilled asparagus, which are divine. He is awesome at grilling anything (meat, veggies, even polenta!)

My cycle should be over now, so I took a pregnancy test this morning: negative :(
Oh well it's just our first real trying...
Also in the last ccl magazine there was an article about "cycle variants".
here are some parts of the article that I found interesting:
" It is very tempting for young women to presume they will experience "text-book" fertility cycles. It only stands to reason : they are young and in the prime of their fertility [...] The ideal NFP chart, however is often not experienced.[...] Dr Brown's finding have led him to conclude that many cycle irregularities experienced by young women should be considered normal. [...]" Cycle variants should not be considered as abnormal; they are normal response to the environment to ensure that pregnancy does not occur under very unfavorable conditions for the mother and fetus." ...[...] cycle varients occuring in a young woman's cycle are nature wake-up calls; something is out of order within the woman's life: too much stress, too little nutritious food, too much or too little excersice, too little sleep etc."

I thought it was really interesting to read that on my second 38+ days cycle in a row...
I finally accepted that hubby is right and I put too much pressure on myself at work. The management is very unclear and there are many contradictory demands every week or more often. This and my crazy hours ( 30 hours over 6 days, mainly on saturdays and evenings..) make sense: I'm indeed under some stress.

This week I also learned something important. I learned that saying " I'm sorry" is actually useful. For some weird reason I always saw the "forgive me " thing as something to do to make yourself feel better: I recognise I hurt you, I feel bad to have you feel this way, I won't do it again...
Until last week when my co-worker apologized to me, and I felt better. :) It was a really new experience for me (I'm 25!!!).
I was resentful because of some small things that happened recently (mainly a lack of communication on schedules and a lack of recognition) and I mentioned the dysfunctions to her, and she minimized it, which made me feel even more resentful.. Then it was my day off, and got over it at some point. But when I came to work the following morning, my coworker came to me and said " Oh I'm glad you're here, I wanted to tell you I'm sorry for what happened the other day, I wasn't aware you didn't know you would be alone..." or something like that. I felt like 200 lbs flying off me :)

Apologies feel good sometimes. :) I'm glad I now understand how it works both ways..

being thankful- a priest that made my life different

Part2 of my week of gratitude for religious persons (part 1 was about a favorite sister). I make it a week because there are many sisters and priests in my life, and even some pastors..
Today I would like to introduce you Father Vincent.

Father Vincent is a wonderful priest whom I met during my third year of college. He was officially in charge of students at the university, and he was doing a great job at it.
Now I had met priests before in my life. But it never occurred to me that they were existing longer than an hour on Sunday mornings, or that they would ever wear something else that a alb and chasuble...
Well Father Vincent was different from any other priest because he talked. He was not only recitating prayers and preaching, he was simply talking with anyone who was there. The student room was a great place where we would share lunch and chit chat in between classes.. The more time I spent there, the more I wanted to go back. I met some of my best friends, and I learned so much about God, Jesus, community and fraternity.
I'm very thankful for Father Vincent because he is a wonderful priest. He simply follows Christ's example of humanity: joyful, prayerful, deep in wisdom and knowledge, and very caring. I don't know any other priest who makes you feel like you matter, for real. I've met many great persons and religious ones, and I know how good they take care of their "flock". But he was not only taking care, he was caring.
Father Vincent is the one who made me understand what fatherhood is about.
There is this one verse of the letter to the Corinthian that always comes to my mind:
"Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel." (1 Cor 4:15)

And indeed I may have dozens of priests that I met since and know by name, he is the one who brought me to a living faith. :)

Sunday was the good Shepherd gospel. The Good Shepherd knows his sheet, and they listen to his voice.
Because a priest took time to talk with me, I took time to listen.
I'm so happy that Father Vincent is now a seminarian teacher. If there is one person to pass down his joy and passion of being a priest, he is the one!


My last year of college he went to Roma to study and get a PhD and I was very honored to read his thesis about the Holy Spirit (about GS 22,5). I'm very glad we kept in touch anyway, he always took the time to follow up on my discerning, to make sure I found some other priest for direction etc. And when we started the marriage preparation I asked him to celebrate in France and he made sure he even gave us skype appointement to receive marriage counselling (more personnal than the diocese group class).

When I pray for vocations I pray that God send us priests like him, who are taking the time to go beyond the shaking hands after service. People who can shake your life with the Gospel.

my favorite sister...

For the week end of prayer for the vocations, Laura had the GREAT idea to post a small tribute to the religious people who made an impression on your life...

I will start with a favorite sister, I will be away this week end but I'd love to schedule an other one for Sunday...

Anyway here goes the story of how I met my favorite sister.

In college we had different buildings for the first two years and the following ones. When I arrived in the nice old building there was a catholic aumonerie across the street. I was tepidly christian, more interested than practicing, and certainly prompt to judge cathlic people, based on mostly ignorance and bad previous experience. I met there some great friends, and a wonderful priest (but that's an other story)..
Bref, during this year we went for a student's pilgrimage to Chartres

It was cool, fun and very spiritual. Truly a life changing experience for me. I went praying for two main intentions: getting some respect for my dad, and clearing things with my boyfriend (unsure as to getting engaged or not).
When I got back my dad quit smocking (the very first sign of will power I ever saw in him) and my boyfriend broke up with me.
Awkwardly that was the BEST month ever. It was Easter and I went to all celebrations...
My life became meaningful and interesting. I was really starting to believe in God and trust Him and it makes all the difference in the world..
"where is the sister? "you're asking... Hang in there one more minute we're getting there.

After that Palm Sunday pilgrimage we had such a good time that we (our little chapter of walk= 5 people) decided to go again, just by ourselves.
We planed the road, and looked for a place to spend the night.
I looked on the yellow pages for sisters to dwell us for a night.
Here I am calling a small community I had never heard of: Filles de Jesus de Kermaria
The lady on the phone had such a sweet voice. She was very soft and nice.
Turned out they just moved in and she barely knew her fellow sisters in the new community, but they took the risk to welcome us for one night.

The lady on the phone was sister Liliane. (YAY in doing this post I found there is a full article about her on their website!!)
She was the first sister I met who was glowing with joy and enthousiasm.
All 4 sisters were happy and positive, peaceful but full of personality.. They were just like every other human being, only a better version.
They really made an impression on me, and the following year when I went for a vocational year I spent a lot of time with them.
I went to Britany with them, for a 2 week stay in their retirment house, I even went to Cameroon to meet other younger sisters and the noviciat.
I would have loved to become one of them. I was somewhat on the way there...
Obviously God had other plans for me :)
But I received so much from their company, I somehow still try to follow their charism, just because it echoed so strongly with what I am deep inside.

Thanks sister Liliane for showing me how happiness is easy, how following God is a joyful way, no matter how hard it gets.

And because it's May I'll post the prayer I say every night, in communion with them:
(and I invite every one, which ever religion you have, to meditate on the "humility which frees us")

Mary, teach us to honour

the Sacred Humanity of your Son,

the Incarnate Word,

with no other desire

than to do the Father's will.

Help us to go forward,

using every available means

to grow in humility which frees us

and in simplicity which leads us to peace,

gentleness and confidence in God.

May we be united to Christ our Lord

and filled with his Spirit

so that we may seek

the Father's glory in all things.

May we, with living faith,

firm hope and glowing charity,

work with Him for the salvation of mankind.

Amen.

the beauty of believing

Here is a text I love dearly, it doesn't come from the Bible, but it sounds very much like a psalm. It played a great part in my interest in relating to God :)
It's so beautiful when sung...

By the Glorious Morning Light,

And by the Night when it is still,-

Thy Guardian-Lord hath not forsaken thee, nor is He displeased.

And verily the Hereafter will be better for thee than the present.

And soon will thy Guardian-Lord give thee (that wherewith) thou shalt be well-pleased.

Did He not find thee an orphan and give thee shelter (and care)?

And He found thee wandering, and He gave thee guidance.

And He found thee in need, and made thee independent.

Therefore, treat not the orphan with harshness,

Nor repulse the petitioner (unheard);

But the bounty of the Lord - rehearse and proclaim!

art project: final! :)

We finished the big work on the art room last Saturday.
AND, it will not be undone as soon as expected!! YAY!!
here are some pictures of the colorful room :)
kids working, it was busy, a little hard to keep them all busy... I appointed 3 of them " Masters of the Sponge", their mission was to clean the mess of the others... They were almost fighting to become " Master of the Sponge"! But if I ask them to pick up a paper : "why me?" I need to find a cool name for paper pick up... sigh.


side of the room with the sunrise.. The ceiling is also covered with blue paper, part of it painted in black, part with a few clouds... I didn't take picture of the whole thing though..
and this is the sunset part of the sky, with our sparkling purple mountains...
The tree, made of cardboard pieces, covered with glue and shredded construction paper. The leaves are in the shape of Palms. They all wrote a prayer on one side of the leaves, and we put them up for Palm Sunday. During the upcoming weeks we'll write more prayers to put up..
the artists! (some heads cut, sorry...)

the busyness in the cafeteria on Saturdays afternoons:

Art project!

We started the Art Project last Saturday. The idea is to redecorate the whole room, and learn about biblical stories. :)
Last week they didn't do much learning though... We split the group in half: the younger kids prepared the "night part" of the ceiling, and the older group tried to built a city (Jerusalem) and the Temple. I don't have pictures of the second group though.
Here are our younger friends preparing the ceiling:

These are not sheeps, but clouds...

To make it look like night we used diluted paint on a blue paper, and once dry we added cute little tinfoil starts (2$ for 400 at the pharmacy)



It really does look like a starry night :)
Some children remembered the story of Abraham looking at the stars, and then at mass that was the reading! I was so happy about it! good timing!!