It's about time I post about the last chapter of The first years of forever! Remember that was why I wanted to review the book to start with?
I skip over chapters 8 and 9: handbook for husbands and handbook for wives: how to love your partner. I haven't read the one for husbands at all.. the one for wives is basically a repeat of the rest of the book, with some developments around Proverb 31(10-31).
Mr. L and I started a short conversation yesterday night, but sleep caught up with us. He was saying it's sad that one of us will die and leave the other alone at some point. Of course it's somewhat sad to think about it. But I believe there is a heaven, something that last longer than life, the relationships we have last forever, especially the one you spend so much time and energy to build and renew day after day...
It's time now to review that last chapter. :)
"does death mean the end of the love we share? Will we be separate, if we meet in heaven will it be by passing, one becoming two again? We encourage you to develop an eternal perspective of love and marriage based on the truth... The answers we share in this chapter are what we believe the Bible tech or suggest concerning love and marriage in heaven" there will be no marriage in heaven, because we won't need it. 7 reasons: 1- no death, no need for reproduction (this is maybe the only one I disagree with. Even without death, I believe God would love more unique souls)
2- no need to be healed of loneliness 3-no need for someone to complete you: marriage was design to bring completion to man and woman as the two become one, but in heaven we will experience our completeness in Christ and will be satisfied (Col 2:9)
4- no symbol, the real thing. Marriage is a symbol of Jesus and the Church, in heaven no need for symbols. 5- no need for protection. Our love here needs to be protected, not in heaven. 6-all relationships will be important. 7-we will concentrate on God, not on each other
>>> Some of those are begging for more explanations.
#2 pretty much speaks for itself. #3 is clear enough. #4 could lead to a great theological speech about universal church... But for now I'll focus just on the last 3 ones.
One saying I like goes " getting married is taking the chance to fall in love all over again". Well it says so in my memory. In other terms love as an easy feeling comes and goes, but when you get married (in my definition of marriage) you DECIDE to build the relationship. everyday you chose to act with love, to show respect, attention, care etc. This is love. And yes we are selfish beings, sometimes we need to be reminded of our choices, and that this person who goes on my nerves right now is the one I chose to spend my life with. Marriage is protection from ourselves, it makes someone else more important, it takes you out of selfish comfort zones and it is difficult at times, but priceless.
-6 all relationships will be important. We will be free from sin, free from judging each other, free from hiding our feelings, our failures etc. Wow... I can't wait to see my former classmates! LOL
-7 we will concentrate on God. I see heaven as some kind of choir. We have all a specific voice to sing with, some are altos, some are baritones... But all together it's an awesome ensemble. We won't fight over who has the right tune, we will just enjoy the music. :)
Back to our book.
"But what will happen to our love in heaven? [marriage] is housed in legal, public, sacred commitment, but that's not all of it. In the process of living out the commitment, the relationship has become a living entity of love. Love is the one thing that will last. The only thing we can take with us. Marriage as institution is superfluous in heaven, but love is certainly not. Not a drop of what we have felt, and shared and demonstrated will be lost. "then too, we know that God's love is always personal and specific, not a vague diffused good-will towards everyone in general and nobody in particular. Because New Testament love involves people and relationships we can be sure that love will not be a vague and lonely ideal in heaven, anymore than it is on earth. [...] We can be confident that ou earthly loved one will be a part of it. We look forward to sweet fellowship with them as we adore our Lord God together. [Although we will be complete and without needs] It's difficult to imagine heaven without some closeness with those we have loved best on earth.
>>> I like this part. I do believe love is the only thing that really matters in life. Not the general impersonal feeling and empty word, the tricky love your neighbor part. My neighbor Phil is really easy to love so I'm glad we're a team. But there is still a lot of work to do! ;) I also believe that whether you spend 2 hours or 20 years with someone doesn't matter, what matters is how it touches you and makes you better or leave you blank and indifferent. But if you spend 60 years with someone who brings the best out of you.. wow!!!
Next time, part 2: lessons in love :)
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