Still looking forward for phase III... NFP users will know what I mean ;)
Anyway... we got engaged in january/february, but decided to wait to make it official until my parents meet him... in August.
So when we officially announced the engagement, in September, I got a few: "oh are you planning to have a baby?" or "why the rush?" but that was fine.
The reactions that most surprised me where since Tuesday, because I changed my name.
I was surprised that some persons were surprised. Some of my girlfriends consider it's a little conservative to change your name after you're married...Well I love my new name :)
I'm proud of it. I didn't choose it, sure. But I choose my husband. And his name is beautiful. And we are starting our own family, why would I keep my father's name?
How would that make me less conservative?
We both have names with evident meaning. I think it's cute.
I'm a linguist, since forever I've been in love with etymology and semantic.
I think changing your name is part of the whole changing of life thing.
For the sacrament of confirmation we are offered to adopt an extra first name, well for the sacrament of mariage we are offered to adopt a new last name.I used to carry a beautiful name, a flower, not so easy to grab ;)
Now I'm an innocent animal, a biblical picture, covered with wool, just like my husband's hair... Will that change affect my character? I don't think so. But not changing my name would be, in my point of view, like saying:
"oh yes I'm married, but I don't want anyone to know about it, in case it wouldn't work. And above all I don't want to change anything in my life. No change, everything has to remain the same..."
I think changing name will actually help me become a better wife, that can help me remember that it's not only me who decide everything from now on, and that what I do will have effects on him. And yes some things will change...
Also I'm quite proud to go to the bank and ask for the form to change my name ;)
Maybe if he had some awful name like "grossmerdkipu" I would rethink the initiatic meaning of changing name...
But right now I'm just surprised to receive shocked reactions... They are always friendly comments, but something in the tone makes me uneasy , it sounds like " oh you're one of those submitted wives!"
I guess I'm one of them. I think I should involve my husband in my decisions and everyday life. Just as much as I expect him to involve me in his. Any thing less would make us room mates...
